Frank

7. Snow. It doesn’t snow during Easter. Frosty the Snowman, Rudolf the Red-nosed Reindeer, Christmas snow globes- all Easter has is rabbits and eggs. ﾠ

6. Rabbits. Rabbits in fiction are kind of wierd. Bugs Bunny doesn’t have any pants on. Don’t get me started about “Frank” from Donnie Darko…

5. Daylight. The actual celebration is in the morning. With Christmas Eve, there are the glowing candles- Silent Night, and all the rest. Also, Christmas parties and drinking go together. With Easter, you have sunrise services (can’t start drinking at 6 a.m.) and other services are done before noon. Nothing good for commerce happens before noon. Except Denny’s Grand Slam Breakfast. ﾠ

4. Clothes. Easter outfits, especially for men. In the past, men and boys would wear a new suit. Now, besides so many people not going to church on Easter, period, if they do go, try to get a boy into a suit. For that matter, try to get his dad in a suit. ﾠ

3. Songs. You can name a couple dozen secular Christmas songs (Think: Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer, for instance). Now, other than Here Comes Peter Cottontail and Easter Parade (you might not even know these as I may be dating myself), name a secular Easter song. Rock on… ﾠ

2. Sex. Try connecting Easter and sex. I saw an ad for a male enhancement product in the LA Times (nice revenue source) using Easter, bunnies, a scantily clad woman, and the product. About as bizarre as you can get. ﾠ

1. Body. Even secular people can appreciate a baby in a manger. Corpses coming back to life? Not so cute. ﾠ

Have a blessed Easter, anyway!

(See the first list on this blog!)